Unfortunately, most people don’t realize there are two ways we can avoid commitment: Actively or Passively.
- We actively avoid commitment by making it clear or in some way obvious to others that we are disinterested and/or are conflicted about commitment.
- We passively avoid commitment by pursuing unavailable partners, impossible circumstances and by pushing or waiting for conflicted and/or disinterested partners to make a commitment.
Most of us are familiar with the ways people actively avoid commitment, but that’s not the case with passive commitment avoidance. Here’s an important rule of thumb to always remember in regard to relationships: If you have one partner in a relationship who is conflicted and/or uncommitted, you always have two. No exceptions.
Marital limbo is never the result of one partner’s behavior in the relationship – it’s always the result of the choices that each partner in the relationship is making independently.