How To Forgive Your Wife For Cheating —> The Reasons You Are Struggling To Forgive Your Wife For Cheating Might Be Different From What You Think.

Are You Struggling To Forgive Your Wife For Cheating?

There are two types of betrayed men who struggle after their wives cheat —> betrayed men who are desperate to get their wives to recommit to the marriage and betrayed men whose wives have ALREADY recommitted to the marriage.

Betrayed men whose wives have already recommitted to the marriage know something that betrayed men who are “in-pursuit-of-a-commitment” don’t know. Betrayed men whose wives have already recommitted to the marriage know that getting a commitment from their wives doesn’t change anything.

Why Getting Your Wife To Recommit To The Marriage Doesn’t Change Anything

Getting your wife to recommit to the marriage doesn’t take away the pain of being cheated on; it doesn’t take away your insecurities about your wife cheating on you again; and it doesn’t make you STOP THINKING about your wife’s betrayal.

In fact, getting a commitment from your wife can actually make things worse for you instead of better in terms of “thinking” about the betrayal. The reason is, men in pursuit of a commitment are focused on winning their wives back, so they have something “other” than their wife’s betrayal to focus on. While betrayed men whose wives have already recommitted, don’t have that luxury — instead, their minds are hyper-focused on the betrayal itself.

If this is the situation that you’re currently in, then you know exactly what I’m talking about. Your mind has become your worst enemy — and you are literally being tormented by thoughts and pictures in your head of your wife being with another man from the time you wake up in the morning until the time you go to sleep at night—that’s if you can even sleep—because for a lot of men obsessive thinking gets worse for them at night. So how can you forgive your wife for cheating on you, when all you think about is your wife cheating on you? 

Do You Really Want To Forgive Your Wife For Cheating On You
Or Do You Just Want To STOP THINKING About It?

As I mentioned above, there are two types of betrayed men who struggle after their wives cheat, this article is for men whose wives have ALREADY ended their affairs and recommitted to their marriages. It’s important to note that women usually end their affairs and recommit to their marriages when they’re married to men who either a) want to divorce them for cheating or b) are indifferent to them after cheating. As you’ll learn below, my client Patrick’s wife was no exception to this common case scenario.

During our initial consultation, Patrick (not his real name) said, “I need to move past this—but I don’t know how I’m ever going to get the image of my wife screwing another guy out of my head. I just can’t stop thinking about it.”

I asked Patrick if he considered leaving his wife for cheating on him. Patrick said that he intended to do that initially; he contacted an attorney within days of discovering his wife’s affair. But Patrick said his wife’s reaction made him reconsider. Patrick said that his wife told him she would do anything to make things right and begged him not to leave her.

I asked Patrick a series of questions because I wanted to know “specifically” why he had chosen to stay with his wife. I knew that Patrick’s reasons for staying with his wife could either help or hinder his ability to forgive her.  

It turns out that Patrick didn’t experience a change of heart at all because of his wife’s reaction. By that, I mean, Patrick didn’t decide to stay with his wife because he wanted to create a deeper and more meaningful relationship with her. Instead, Patrick decided to stay with his wife because a) he didn’t want to look like the bad guy b) he wanted to avoid the embarrassment of people finding out that he had been cheated on and c) he thought his wife’s affair gave him a life-long hall pass to sleep with other women. 

Patrick was very forthcoI continued asPatrick was being eaten up inside—because first, his wife betrayed him; and then after his wife betrayed him, Patrick betrayed himself—because cheating was, in fact, a deal breaker for him. You see, Patrick didn’t choose to stay with his wife because he wanted to create a deeper and more meaningful relationship with her. Instead, Patrick chose to stay with his wife because a) he didn’t want to look like the bad guy b) he wanted to avoid the embarrassment of people finding out that he had been cheated on and c) he thought his wife’s affair gave him a life-long hall pass to sleep with other women.

There were three reasons that Patrick couldn’t get over his wife cheating on him. 1. heating  because part of him didn’t was simply experiencing because he didn’t 

 

Third —> Accept that you don’t really know how you feel about your wife yet. This can be scary for men who aren’t ready to face the possibility of divorce. But the reality is that you may not want to forgive your wife for a reason. For example, you may not want to forgive your wife—because, on some level, you know that you can’t trust her, and not forgiving her is a form of self protection. Or, maybe you can’t forgive your wife because infidelity is a deal breaker for you—and therefore, staying with your wife is a form of self betrayal.

Do An Honest Assessment. Can You Untangle The Issues?

Do an honest assessment to determine whether you believe you can untangle the issues on your own. If you believe your thoughts are too tangled together — don’t put off getting the support you need. Contact Ashley to learn more about scheduling a consultation.

If you haven’t read the Women’s Infidelity books, that’s where you need to start. You’ll find out exactly what your wife is thinking, feeling and planningso you can stop analyzing—and stop operating from a mindset that leads to divorce. Note: All book orders include a FREE COPY of “Save Your Marriage Now!” (For Men).

Order Women’s Infidelity Now

Recommended By Counselors And Therapists All Over The World

Women’s Infidelity: Living In Limbo

Learn The REAL Reasons Women Cheat, And:

Why women lose sexual desire for their husbands
Why women are more likely than men to become addicted to affair sex
Why marriage and fidelity can actually be MORE difficult for women than it is for men
Why women have such a hard time ending and getting over their affairs
• Why women overwhelmingly initiate the majority of all divorces – even when they’re married to good men
Why and how men unknowingly make the problem worse by doing the opposite of what they need to do to save their marriages

Women’s Infidelity II: Breaking Out Of Limbo

Learn How To Sort Through Your Feelings:

How to know if your feelings for the other man are real
• How to understand your feelings for your husband – what it really means when you say, “I love him, but I’m not “in” love with him
How to know if there’s a possibility for a future with the other man
• How to stop your circular thinking
How to end your confusion and move forward in 7 clearly defined steps
Men: This book is for you, too. In this book you’ll learn how women process infidelity. Find out exactly what your wife is thinking and feeling

Order Women’s Infidelity Now

Order Women’s Infidelity Now! … Find Out Why It’s So Hard For Women To End And Get Over Their Affairs